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self-awareness
Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller and professor

Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller and professor

“Today I choose courage over comfort.” – Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller and professor

Brené Brown, a research professor, author, and renowned speaker, is celebrated worldwide for her groundbreaking work on vulnerability, courage, shame, and empathy. This quote encapsulates her core philosophy: that true growth—whether personal, relational, or professional—comes not from staying safe within our comfort zones, but from making the conscious decision to face discomfort and uncertainty with bravery.

Brown’s landmark research revealed that vulnerability is not a weakness, but the greatest measure of courage. She explored these ideas in bestsellers like Daring Greatly, The Gifts of Imperfection, and Rising Strong, inspiring millions across the globe to lead more authentic, whole-hearted lives. Her now-famous TED Talk, “The Power of Vulnerability,” has become a touchstone in conversations about human connection and resilience.

The context for “Today I choose courage over comfort” can be found throughout Brown’s writings and lectures. For Brown, integrity is defined by the willingness to act with courage even when it’s uncomfortable, choosing what is right over what is easy. In her book Rising Strong, she writes:

“Integrity is choosing courage over comfort; choosing what is right over what is fun, fast, or easy; and choosing to practice our values rather than simply professing them.”

Brown consistently emphasizes that vulnerability and courage are inextricably linked—there is no courage without uncertainty and emotional risk. Whether addressing leaders, entrepreneurs, or anyone striving for meaningful change, she challenges us to “show up, be seen, and live brave” even when endurance is hard.

About Brené Brown:
A research professor at the University of Houston, Brown’s two decades of study have shaped contemporary conversations around emotional intelligence, ethical leadership, and authentic connection. She is celebrated for bringing academic rigor to subjects previously avoided in business and personal development: the mechanics of trust, the costs of shame, and the anatomy of belonging.


Pioneers in the Field of Courage and Vulnerability

Brown’s work builds upon and amplifies insights from earlier theorists who explored courage, authenticity, and human flourishing:

  • Theodore Roosevelt: His “Man in the Arena” speech inspired Brown’s focus on daring greatly—celebrating those who risk failure in pursuit of something meaningful.
  • Carl Rogers: A foundational humanistic psychologist, Rogers championed unconditional positive regard and authenticity in relationships, emphasizing the healing power of being seen and accepted as we are.
  • Abraham Maslow: Known for Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, he placed self-actualization—the fulfillment of one’s potential—at the top, arguing that courage to grow is what drives humans upward.
  • Viktor Frankl: The Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist described meaning as a central motivator in life, and wrote extensively on the courage necessary to find purpose even in hardship.
  • Angela Duckworth: A contemporary researcher, Duckworth studies grit, the combination of passion and perseverance, dovetailing with Brown’s view that courage sustains effort beyond comfort.

Together, these theorists shaped the understanding that thriving requires more than talent or intelligence—it demands the willingness to be vulnerable, to stumble, and to rise stronger.


Resonance of the Quote

“Today I choose courage over comfort” stands as a daily reminder to honour our values, even when ease and avoidance tempt us. Brown’s legacy is the call to action: Lead with heart. Embrace discomfort. Make the brave choice—not just once, but day after day, in ways that transform lives, organizations, and communities.

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Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller and professor

Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller and professor

“Blame is simply the discharging of discomfort and pain. It has an inverse relationship with accountability. Blaming is a way that we discharge anger.” – Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

The quote emerges from Brené Brown’s extensive research into vulnerability, emotional intelligence, and the social dynamics of blame and accountability. As a renowned research professor, author, and speaker, Brown has spent decades exploring how people respond to adversity, shame, and imperfection, particularly in contexts that demand courage and connection.

This particular insight derives from Brown’s exploration of why people instinctively assign blame when confronted with pain or anger. Rather than solving problems or fostering growth, blame offers a false sense of relief—it shifts discomfort outward and temporarily soothes our own emotional turmoil. However, as Brown’s research demonstrates, blame is ultimately counterproductive; it consumes energy that could be spent on honest self-reflection and constructive dialogue, undermining the very possibility of real change or learning.

Brown shares candid, sometimes humorous stories about her own “blamer” tendencies, illuminating the universal nature of these behaviours and the courage required to break the cycle. She emphasizes that accountability—facing our role in situations, admitting mistakes, and communicating openly—demands vulnerability and resilience. True accountability opens the door to empathy, growth, and trust, while habitual blame keeps us defensive and disconnected.

Brown’s work on this subject has become foundational for leaders, educators, and organizations that prioritize psychological safety and high-functioning teams. Her call is not simply to reduce blame, but to build cultures where compassionate responsibility and honest conversations replace finger-pointing and shame.

The Person Behind the Quote: Brené Brown

Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston and a visiting professor at the University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business. She is the author of multiple New York Times bestsellers, including Daring Greatly, The Gifts of Imperfection, and Dare to Lead, and is widely recognized for her TED talk, “The Power of Vulnerability,” which has been viewed by millions worldwide.

Brown’s career is distinguished by her focus on vulnerability, courage, authenticity, and shame. Her work bridges rigorous academic research with practical guidance, helping individuals and organizations harness the power of difficult emotions to foster deeper connection and greater innovation. Her thoughtful insights into the dynamics of blame and accountability have reshaped conversations in business, education, healthcare, and public service.

Leading Theorists Related to Blame and Accountability

The study of blame, accountability, and emotional process has roots in multiple fields, from psychology to conflict resolution. Notable contributors include:

  • Marshall B. Rosenberg: Creator of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), Rosenberg argued that blame and punitive mindsets perpetuate conflict rather than resolve it. He believed that all violence results from people tricking themselves into thinking their pain is caused by others, leading to cycles of blame and retribution. His teachings focus on empathy, personal responsibility, and compassionate dialogue.
  • Andy Stanley: In leadership and organizational theory, Stanley provides insight into the futility of blame as an agent of change. He famously noted, “People who blame things rarely change things. Blame is an unassailable change-avoidance strategy.” His perspective reinforces the notion that embracing accountability is essential for growth and problem-solving.
  • Albert Ellis: A notable psychologist and creator of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), Ellis emphasized personal accountability as central to emotional well-being. He taught that individuals must recognize and change their own irrational beliefs and reactions, including blaming others for their feelings and circumstances.
  • Aaron T. Beck: The father of cognitive therapy, Beck’s research into cognitive distortions highlights that blame is often a symptom of deeper misconceptions about self and others, impeding effective problem-solving and emotional regulation.

Together, these theorists—along with Brown’s own influential voice—have illuminated the traps of reflexive blame and the transformative potential of compassionate accountability. Their collective work speaks to a universal truth: To create lasting change and connection, we must be willing to move beyond blame, confront vulnerability, and embrace responsibility.

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Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.” – Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

This quote from Brené Brown distills the essence of her two decades of research into a simple yet profound truth: True courage is rooted in vulnerability—the willingness to show up authentically and allow ourselves to be seen, despite uncertainty or risk. When Brown speaks of “showing up,” she refers to the act of engaging fully in life, relationships, workplaces, and communities, even when outcomes are uncertain or we fear judgment. The second half, “letting ourselves be seen,” invites individuals to move beyond façades, embrace their authentic selves, and risk openness in order to foster genuine connection and growth.

Brown’s work has illuminated how authentic leadership and meaningful relationships depend not on perfection or bravado, but on the willingness to be vulnerable. Her research demonstrates that courageous leadership, innovation, and resilient cultures emerge when people are supported in being seen as they are, imperfections and all.

Brown first brought this perspective into the public consciousness with her widely viewed TEDx talk, “The Power of Vulnerability,” where she explored the intersection of courage, vulnerability, and shame. Since then, she has expanded on these themes through bestsellers such as Daring Greatly, Dare to Lead, and The Gifts of Imperfection. The quote epitomizes her belief that vulnerability is not a weakness but the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change.

About Brené Brown

Brené Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston, where she holds the Huffington Foundation Endowed Chair at the Graduate College of Social Work. She is also a visiting professor of management at the University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business. Brown’s work is grounded in qualitative research, focusing on the complex human experiences of courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy.

She is the author of six #1 New York Times bestsellers and the host of the acclaimed podcasts Unlocking Us and Dare to Lead. Brown’s influence extends from academia into popular culture and organizations worldwide. Her TED talk, “The Power of Vulnerability,” ranks among the most viewed globally, reflecting her skill as a storyteller who marries in-depth research with accessible, relatable insights. She has also produced content for major platforms such as Netflix and HBO Max, further advancing conversations on leadership and emotional intelligence.

Leading Theorists Related to the Subject Matter

The study of courage, vulnerability, and personal growth is informed by a rich tapestry of psychological and sociological thought. In addition to Brown, several theorists have shaped the contemporary understanding of these topics:

  • Carl Rogers: A founding figure in humanistic psychology, Rogers emphasized the importance of unconditional positive regard and authentic self-expression, arguing that being truly seen by others fosters personal growth. His client-centered approach underpins much of the value placed on vulnerability in modern psychological practice.
  • Albert Bandura: Bandura’s work on self-efficacy and social learning underscores the significance of modeling behaviors—including the courage to take risks and reveal one’s authentic self—as mechanisms for individual and group development.
  • Kristin Neff: A pioneer in self-compassion research, Neff explores how self-kindness and mindfulness promote resilience and openness, particularly in the face of perceived failure or imperfection. Her work aligns closely with Brown’s focus on vulnerability and shame resilience.
  • James K. Stoller (and contemporaries in leadership science): Research on authentic leadership highlights that transparent, vulnerable leaders inspire trust, foster innovation, and achieve better outcomes in complex environments—a direct reflection of Brown’s themes.

Brown’s scholarship is uniquely influential because she bridges the academic and practical realms, showing how research-backed principles of courage and connection are essential not just for personal transformation, but for healthy organizations and communities. Her insight—that courage begins with the simple but costly act of showing up and being seen—speaks to a universal need and a timeless call to leadership and humanity.

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Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

Quote:  Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

““Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy – the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” – Brené Brown – researcher, storyteller, and professor

Brené Brown is a renowned researcher, storyteller, and professor whose work has fundamentally reshaped how we understand and engage with concepts such as vulnerability, courage, shame, and empathy. As a research professor at the University of Houston and the director of the Center for Daring Leadership at BetterUp, Brown has spent more than two decades delving into how these attributes shape our sense of connection, leadership, and psychological well-being.

The quote in question comes from Brown’s deep exploration into the “power of vulnerability.” Her seminal TEDx talk in 2010, The Power of Vulnerability, distilled a decade of academic research into a message that resonated around the world. Brown’s research revealed that embracing our vulnerabilities—not hiding from them—is essential for experiencing the fullness of love, belonging, and joy. She argues that running from our stories, especially those parts we hide out of shame, actually distances us from meaning, connection, and authenticity. True courage, she asserts, is found not in avoiding darkness or risk but in stepping into it, trusting that doing so reveals our deepest strengths.

Brown’s work is grounded in her use of qualitative research methods, particularly Grounded Theory, to analyse interviews and narratives across hundreds of individuals. This rigorous approach uncovered that resilience in the face of shame and the willingness to be open—rather than closed off—directly correlates with living a more fulfilling, wholehearted life.

Context of the Quote

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it…” encapsulates Brown’s thesis: the real danger lies not in being vulnerable but in refusing vulnerability altogether. In a world where self-presentation—magnified by social media and societal pressures—often feels safer than honesty, Brown’s research champions a countercultural embrace of openness. Her ideas have rapidly gained influence, particularly among younger generations striving for authenticity in both personal and professional spheres.

Influential Theorists and Roots of Brown’s Work

Brown’s scholarship is deeply interwoven with and builds upon major figures in psychology and human development:

  • Carl Rogers: A pioneer of humanistic psychology and client-centered therapy, Rogers emphasized unconditional positive regard and the importance of authenticity and self-acceptance in personal growth. His work set a foundation for understanding the power of vulnerability in relationships and self-development.

  • Viktor Frankl: Known for logotherapy and his book Man’s Search for Meaning, Frankl explored the critical human drive for purpose and meaning—ideas echoed in Brown’s focus on connection as life’s true source of meaning.

  • John Bowlby: The father of attachment theory, Bowlby’s research illustrated how early bonds shape our capacity for connection, trust, and vulnerability—a notion that Brown centers in her exploration of belonging and shame.

  • Alfred Adler: Adler’s work on inferiority, social connectedness, and the drive for significance deeply influenced subsequent understandings of resilience and self-worth, both of which are central to Brown’s research on shame and courage.

  • Harriet Lerner: A prominent psychologist and author on topics of shame and connection, Lerner helped shine a light on the role these experiences play in our sense of self and in relationships.

In the contemporary era, Kristin Neff—a psychologist and leading researcher on self-compassion—has also contributed to our understanding of the imperative for kindness towards oneself, a concept that complements Brown’s prescriptions for overcoming shame.

Brown’s Impact and Legacy

By fusing rigorous academic research with relatable storytelling, Brené Brown has made vulnerability, honesty, and emotional courage central tenets of modern leadership, organizational culture, and personal development. Her books, podcasts, and talks are credited with igniting global conversations about mental and emotional health—a legacy that continues to resonate through businesses, educational institutions, and social movements. Often described as offering “data with soul”, Brown’s work is both a call and a roadmap for embracing the fullness of our humanity, trusting that only by facing our darkness can we unlock the infinite power of our own light.

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Quote: Jim Collins – Author, academic

Quote: Jim Collins – Author, academic

“The most powerfully transformative executives possess a paradoxical mixture of personal humility and professional will. They are timid and ferocious. Shy and fearless. They are rare – and unstoppable.” – Jim Collins – Author, academic

Jim Collins, the author behind this quote, is a renowned figure in business thinking whose work has fundamentally shaped how organizations and leaders view greatness and transformation. Collins is best known for his ground-breaking research and best-selling books on business management, leadership, and organizational sustainability, with “Good to Great” standing out as a seminal text.

Jim Collins’ Backstory and Context of the Quote

Jim Collins began his professional journey with a Bachelor of Science in Mathematical Sciences from Stanford University, followed by an MBA from the Stanford Graduate School of Business. Early in his career, he worked at McKinsey & Company, where he witnessed first-hand the research that would underpin In Search of Excellence, one of the early classics in management literature.

His intellectual curiosity led him to academia, where he taught at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business and earned distinction for his contributions. It was during this period that Collins started asking probing questions: What sets truly great companies apart? How do ordinary organizations become exceptional? These explorations culminated in his influential research laboratory in Boulder, Colorado, where he worked with leaders from diverse sectors—corporate, non-profit, and even the military.

The featured quote exemplifies Collins’s insight from the “Level 5 Leadership” concept, introduced in Good to Great. Through extensive research, Collins and his team identified that the most transformative leaders combined personal humility with unwavering professional will. These leaders are not brash or self-aggrandizing; rather, their strength is paradoxical. They are both “timid and ferocious,” “shy and fearless,” embodying a rare blend of virtues that make them, as Collins notes, “unstoppable”. This philosophy challenged the then-prevailing myth that only charismatic, larger-than-life personalities could lead organizations to enduring success.

About Jim Collins

Jim Collins is recognized as a preeminent business thinker worldwide, having authored or co-authored six major works—including Built to Last, Good to Great, and How the Mighty Fall—that have collectively sold over ten million copies. Beyond his research and writing, Collins has worked as a consultant and teacher to executives in both the public and private sectors, and his influence extends far beyond academia. He has been shaped by mentorships with other leading thinkers, notably Peter Drucker, whom Collins has described as his greatest inspiration.

Leading Theorists Related to Transformative Leadership

The field of transformative and paradoxical leadership draws on a rich tradition of management thought:

  • Peter Drucker is considered the father of modern management and was a major influence on Collins. Drucker’s approach to management emphasized integrity, decentralization, and a focus on results rather than charisma or force of personality. Drucker’s writings, including The Practice of Management, underpin much of today’s thinking on leadership effectiveness and long-term organizational success.
  • Tom Peters and Robert Waterman were pivotal figures in developing the excellence movement with their book In Search of Excellence. Their research, which Collins encountered during his time at McKinsey, focused on the traits that distinguish high-performing organizations, including the importance of strong yet humble leadership.
  • Warren Bennis contributed significantly to leadership studies, particularly around authentic leadership—leaders who are self-aware, guided by values, and able to inspire trust and performance within teams.
  • John Kotter is known for his work on leading organizational change, emphasizing that effective transformational leaders create a sense of urgency, craft a vision, and empower others—a framework that complements Collins’s observations on humility and will.
  • James MacGregor Burns introduced the concept of transformational leadership, describing leaders who motivate followers by raising their level of morality and motivation, echoing Collins’s findings about humility and aspiration.

Legacy and Impact

The synthesis of personal humility and professional will continues to redefine what is expected of leaders in business and beyond. Collins’s insights have inspired executives and aspiring leaders to seek greatness not through ego or bravado, but through resilience, discipline, and a quiet but relentless drive for excellence. His ongoing contributions keep shaping new generations of leaders in pursuit of not just success, but true and enduring greatness.

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Quote: Shannon L. Alder – Author, therapist

Quote: Shannon L. Alder – Author, therapist

“You have two choices in life when it comes to truthful observations by others that anger you: You can be ashamed and cover it up by letting your pride take you in the extreme opposite direction, in order to make the point that they are wrong. Or, you can break down the walls of pride by accepting vulnerability as a strength, not a weakness. As you walk through your vulnerability, you will meet humility on the way to courage. From here, courage allows us to let go of shame and rise higher into the person we are meant to be, not the person that needs to be right. This is the road to confidence and self worth.” – Shannon L. Alder – Author, therapist

Shannon L. Alder is an American inspirational author and therapist known for her practical wisdom and deeply empathetic approach to personal growth and relationships. Born in New Mexico in 1970, Alder has built a reputation as a widely quoted writer, with her insights appearing in over 300 books by other authors and extensive online publications. Her works include bestsellers like 300 Questions to Ask Your Parents Before It’s Too Late, 300 Questions LDS Couples Should Ask Before Marriage, and The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Bible, among others.

Alder’s writing is renowned for its direct, nurturing style that invites readers to confront personal truths and seek healing without shame. She draws from her dual experience as a therapist—specializing in recovery from emotional and narcissistic abuse—and as someone who has herself faced and overcome adversity. This combination gives her a unique authority and compassion for the complexities of vulnerability, humility, and courage.

Alder is also known for her “Shannonisms”—aphoristic expressions and bite-sized reflections that circulate widely on social media and in motivational literature. Her focus on vulnerability as a strength, not a weakness, is a cornerstone of her message. She encourages readers to see the act of opening oneself to discomfort and critique as an entry point not to shame, but to authentic self-worth and confidence.

Context of the Quote

The featured quote is drawn from Alder’s exploration of how individuals respond to truthful, sometimes uncomfortable observations from others. She contrasts two paths:

  • One is the instinct to react defensively, allowing pride to shield us by rejecting or countering criticism.
  • The other is to dismantle pride and embrace vulnerability, which is not self-defeat but the groundwork for genuine humility.

Alder suggests that “as you walk through your vulnerability, you will meet humility on the way to courage.” In this philosophy, humility is not about humiliation but about openness to growth. With humility comes courage—the courage to release shame and become the person one is truly meant to be, rather than someone fixated on being right. The result is true confidence and self-worth, achieved through acceptance and transformation rather than avoidance or denial.

Leading Theorists and Intellectual Context

While Shannon L. Alder’s work is highly personal and practical, her ideas align with and echo several major theorists in psychology and personal development:

 
Theorist
Contribution
Brené Brown
Central to modern understanding of vulnerability. In her landmark research, Brown frames vulnerability as the birthplace of courage, creativity, and belonging—paralleling Alder’s emphasis on embracing vulnerability to develop courage and self-worth.
Carl Rogers
Developer of person-centered therapy, Rogers highlighted the importance of authenticity, genuineness, and unconditional positive regard. He believed true growth happens when people accept themselves without pretense—ideas mirrored in Alder’s advocacy for vulnerability as transformative.
Tara Brach
As a psychologist and teacher, Brach’s work on radical acceptance and self-compassion resonates with Alder’s encouragement to let go of shame and move toward genuine self-acceptance and confidence.
Kristin Neff
Pioneered research on self-compassion, which involves treating oneself with kindness during failures and inadequacies—a prerequisite for the humility and courage Alder describes.

Alder’s insights are thus part of a rich tradition that challenges ingrained beliefs about strength, urging us to see openness, humility, and self-reflection as the true sources of personal growth and leadership.

Summary of the Insight

Shannon L. Alder invites us to reconsider our reflex to defend pride and instead walk courageously through vulnerability. The journey she describes is not merely personal but universal—one that has been explored by leading minds in psychology and embraced in modern thinking about what it means to live authentically and lead with empathy. Her words serve as both comfort and call to action: to value truth, abandon defensive pride, and step into the ever-rising cycle of humility, courage, and self-worth

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Term: Self Awareness

Term: Self Awareness

Self-awareness is the capacity to consciously recognize, observe, and understand one’s own feelings, thoughts, motives, and behaviours as they arise. It involves stepping back to notice your internal world—your emotions, thoughts, physical sensations, and urges—which often operate outside of conscious attention. This reflective process can be simple, such as noticing the feelings you have in different social situations, or more complex, such as understanding how your thoughts and emotions interact and influence your behaviour over time.

Key aspects of self-awareness include:

  • Recognizing personal strengths and challenges: Self-aware individuals see both their abilities and areas for improvement, which supports personal growth.
  • Understanding how actions affect others: Beyond self-knowledge, self-awareness extends to perceiving how others view us, allowing for better relationship management and social interactions.
  • Developing self-consciousness: At higher levels, self-awareness includes understanding oneself from both a first-person and a third-person viewpoint—the realization that others have perspectives on us, too.
  • Foundation for growth: Self-awareness is considered the first step toward change, self-improvement, and mental well-being, as you cannot alter what you do not understand.

Daniel Goleman: Theorist and Author

Daniel Goleman is widely regarded as a leading authority on self-awareness and its importance in personal and professional development. A psychologist, journalist, and author, Goleman popularized the concept of emotional intelligence (EQ), of which self-awareness is a fundamental component.

Goleman’s 1985 book, “Vital Lies, Simple Truths”, delves deeply into the mechanisms of self-deception—the ways we avoid confronting uncomfortable truths about ourselves—and how this impedes self-awareness and, subsequently, genuine personal growth. In the book, he explores the psychological defenses that cloud our objective self-perception:

“The mind’s greatest challenge is to see itself without distortion, to maintain the delicate balance between facing difficult realities and sustaining a sense of hope and coherence.”

Goleman’s analysis makes the case that self-awareness is both essential and challenging, as our minds are wired to sometimes shield us from harsh realities. By bringing these mechanisms to light, Goleman offers strategies to enhance self-awareness, emphasizing the benefits of honest introspection for both individuals and organizations.

Goleman’s Biography and Relationship to Self-awareness

Daniel Goleman earned his Ph.D. in psychology from Harvard University, after which he spent many years as a science journalist for The New York Times, reporting on brain and behavioural research. His influential work on emotional intelligence, beginning with his best-selling book “Emotional Intelligence” (1995), reshaped how leaders, companies, and individuals think about personal and social competence. Goleman’s academic rigor, combined with his skill in making psychological concepts accessible, established him as the primary theorist linking self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

Goleman’s insights into self-awareness have had a profound impact on leadership theory, psychotherapy, education, and workplace training, emphasizing that truly understanding oneself is the cornerstone for developing every other aspect of emotional intelligence. His work—especially as detailed in “Vital Lies, Simple Truths”—remains foundational for anyone seeking to understand or improve their own self-awareness and psychological well-being.

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Quote: Anthony de Mello, Jesuit priest, spiritual guide and psychotherapist

Quote: Anthony de Mello, Jesuit priest, spiritual guide and psychotherapist

“Wisdom tends to grow in proportion to one’s awareness of one’s ignorance.” – Anthony de Mello, Jesuit priest, spiritual guide, and psychotherapist

Anthony de Mello was a renowned spiritual teacher and author known for his work on the intersection of spirituality and psychology. His quote highlights an essential aspect of personal growth and self-improvement—the idea that true wisdom comes from recognizing our limitations and understanding what we don’t know.

De Mello’s message suggests that when individuals acknowledge their ignorance or areas where they lack knowledge, they create a space for learning and growth. This awareness fosters humility, encourages open-mindedness, and motivates people to seek out new information and experiences. It is through this process of self-reflection and acceptance of one’s limitations that true wisdom can flourish.

This quote has resonated with many individuals seeking personal development and those in leadership roles who strive to create a culture of continuous learning within their organizations.

Biography

Anthony de Mello, SJ (1931–1987), was an Indian Jesuit priest, spiritual guide, and psychotherapist. He is widely regarded as one of the foremost mystical theologians of the late 20th century. De Mello’s work focused on helping individuals achieve a deeper understanding of their spiritual nature through his unique approach to life and spirituality.

Early Life and Education

De Mello was born in Mumbai (then Bombay), India, into a Catholic family. He originally learned with great discipline the spiritual practices of Ignatius of Loyola, the founder of the Jesuit Order. This foundation laid the groundwork for his future as a master teacher in spiritual retreats that incorporated yoga, vipassana meditation, and other oriental and multicultural spiritual practices.

Spiritual Teaching and Influence

De Mello’s approach to life was simple and direct, often using stories and anecdotes to illustrate profound spiritual truths. He believed that happiness and freedom come from within and that our thoughts are our worst enemies. His books, such as “A Rediscovery of Life,” continue to be influential in contemporary spirituality, emphasizing the importance of self-awareness and acceptance of one’s spiritual nature.

Books and Lectures

De Mello wrote several books, including “A Rediscovery of Life” (his last work), “Doa Sang Katak 1: Meditasi Dengan Cerita,” and “One Minute Wisdom.” His lectures and retreats have had a significant impact on individuals worldwide, helping them to perceive conflicts and paradoxes differently.

Humanitarian Outreach

De Mello was also deeply committed to humanitarian causes. He took at heart the recommendations of the Vatican II Council, showing the way for a possible renovation of Catholic ministry and offering a deeper understanding to people of all faiths or no particular faith. His work continues to inspire attempts to bring about what Ken Wilber calls the “Conveyor Belt” of churches.

Legacy and Recognition

De Mello’s sudden death in 1987 at the age of 56 left a profound impact on his followers and colleagues. He is remembered as a man of much charisma, who became well-known throughout the world through his books, lectures, and retreats. The DeMello Spirituality Center, founded in 1984, continues to extend his approach and message globally.

Influence on Modern Thought

De Mello’s influence extends beyond his own lifetime. His ideas have been integrated into various spiritual traditions and are often compared to those of other important pioneers like Trappist monk Thomas Merton and Fr. Thomas Keating O.C.S.O. His works stand in line with an emerging Integral Catholicism, contributed by Catholic creatives such as Fr. Thomas Berry C.P.

Critical Reception

De Mello’s work has also prompted a censoring reaction from the Vatican’s Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, which led to a reaction in liberal sections of the U.S. Roman Catholic Church and the Mid Asian synod. Despite this, he remains an influential figure in contemporary spiritual thought.

Personal Life

De Mello was known for his sincere and friendly attitude towards people from every religious persuasion, making him comfortable and at home near him. He expressed himself as a genuine brother to all and came to understand that the genuine Catholic Church encompasses all people: Christians and non-Christians.

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Quote: Erwin McManus

Quote: Erwin McManus

“Humility is about self-awareness.” – Erwin McManus, author, speaker, and pastor

The quote “Humility is about self-awareness” is attributed to Erwin McManus, a well-known author, speaker, and pastor. McManus is the lead pastor of Mosaic Church in Los Angeles, a church recognized for its creativity, innovation, and diverse community. He is also the author of several influential books on leadership, faith, and personal development, including The Artisan Soul, The Last Arrow, and The Way of the Warrior.

Context and Meaning Behind the Quote:
This particular quote reflects a recurring theme in McManus’s work: the connection between humility, self-awareness, and personal growth. He often emphasizes that true humility is not about self-deprecation or thinking less of yourself, but about having a clear, honest understanding of who you are—your strengths, weaknesses, and the impact you have on others.

McManus argues that humility is rooted in self-awareness because it requires recognizing both your value and your limitations. People who lack self-awareness may overestimate their abilities (leading to arrogance) or underestimate their worth (leading to insecurity). True humility emerges when you see yourself accurately and are comfortable with both your strengths and your imperfections.

Broader Themes in McManus’s Teachings:

  • Authenticity: He frequently encourages individuals to embrace their true selves rather than striving to meet external expectations.
  • Courage: Humility requires the courage to confront your weaknesses and insecurities.
  • Leadership: McManus teaches that the best leaders lead from a place of humility, which fosters trust, collaboration, and growth.

Practical Application:
When McManus says, “Humility is about self-awareness,” he is encouraging people to:

  • Reflect honestly on their actions, motives, and impact on others.
  • Embrace personal growth by being open to feedback and acknowledging areas for improvement.
  • Avoid comparison—understanding that self-worth is not determined by being better or worse than others.

This perspective aligns with the broader leadership and personal development principle that self-awareness is foundational to growth, emotional intelligence, and effective leadership.

Related Quote from McManus:
“Humility is not about pretending to be less; it is about being honest about our strengths and weaknesses.”
(The Way of the Warrior, 2019)

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Quote: Eckhart Tolle

Quote: Eckhart Tolle

“The past has no power over the present moment.”

Eckhart Tolle

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Quote: Søren Kierkegaard

Quote: Søren Kierkegaard

“Of all deceivers fear most yourself!”

Søren Kierkegaard

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Quote: Ernest Hemingway

Quote: Ernest Hemingway

“You can’t get away from yourself by moving from one place to another.”

Ernest Hemingway

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Quote: Marcus Aurelius

Quote: Marcus Aurelius

“Whenever you are about to find fault with someone, ask yourself the following question: What fault of mine most nearly resembles the one I am about to criticize?”

Marcus Aurelius

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Global Advisors’ Thoughts: So you think you’re self-aware?

Global Advisors’ Thoughts: So you think you’re self-aware?

So you think you’re self-aware?

By Marc Wilson

So you think you’re self-aware? 95% of people believe themselves to be self-aware. Recent research shows that just 10 to 15% of people are (Eurich, T – “Insight” – Crown Business – 2017).

Self-awareness may be the most elusive and challenging skill we attempt to gain. It is a foundation for authentic leadership, it is required to be empathetic, it helps us conquer our insecurities, it is critical for robust, true friendship and love. Without it, we can never be sure that we will achieve happiness. Without self-awareness success will be ill-defined. Also, we will never be sure if how we act and react to others is real or merely a result of our attempts to craft our image to meet our own or others’ desires – or in order to avoid being what we fear.

For many of us, there are people around us who have a better understanding of us than we do ourselves. We delude ourselves based on what we want to be or don’t want to be. It is also a sad reality that our true self….

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http://www.globaladvisors.biz/thoughts/20170724/so-you-think-youre-self-aware

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